Step 1

Purpose of a 1:1 vs standup / email / project review

Use the 1:1 for relationship, priorities, blockers, feedback, and career — topics that need privacy or nuance. Put pure status in writing. Put multi-person decisions in a project review. If the meeting is only “what did you do this week,” cancel it and fix your async.

Step 2

Cadence and length defaults

Default: 30 minutes weekly for new reporting lines; 30–45 biweekly once trust and rhythm exist. Protect the slot. Reschedule deliberately; do not “see if we need it.”

Step 3

Shared agenda template (theirs first)

Shared doc, standing sections:

1) Their items (always first)
2) Your items
3) Feedback both ways
4) Career / growth
5) Commitments (who / what / when)

If their section is empty every week, ask why — fear, nothing to say, or the meeting isn’t useful yet.

Step 4

Running order

  1. Priorities — what matters this week
  2. Blockers — what only you can unblock
  3. Feedback — specific, timely, two-way
  4. Career — even five minutes keeps it alive
  5. Commitments — write them down before you leave

Step 5

Anti-patterns — the refuse-list

Refuse

  • Status dump — that is Slack/email
  • Therapy without action — listen, then name a next step or a referral
  • Eternal cancel — cancellation is a signal; treat it as one
  • Laptop theater — half-present typing kills trust

Step 6

Remote / async variants

Camera on when stakes are high. Async agenda comments 24h ahead beat surprise topics. If time zones destroy weekly live, do biweekly live + short async mid-cycle notes — still protect the live slot.

Step 7

First 30 days with a new reporting line

Over-invest early: weekly, longer if needed, explicit working agreements (how they like feedback, what “urgent” means, career goals). Document commitments so the second month isn’t reinvented memory.

Done

You’re done when…

Done when

  • You have a cadence
  • You have a shared agenda (theirs first)
  • You have a notes / commitments habit
  • You have a written refuse-list of patterns you will not run